The First Day Of Spring...

What a nice day today.

I walked along the sunburnt landscape with a rather casual amble in my step. I was dauntingly relaxed, but I assumed it was just the rays of the sun, breaking through the lofty clouds and bathing me in its warmth. The grass bounced and tickled at the soles of my bare feet, bursting in yellows, greens and golds, and tiny red buds sprouted from the bustling overgrowth. A majestic rainbow stretched across the dome of blue, adorned with fluffy cushions of pale white and grey.

This wasn't a dream. A dream provides segments of solutions to end our problems.

I walked towards my best friend, who sat atop a playground painted with only the brightest and most innocent colours. You stood in front of her, seemingly to be in deep conversation... you both got along so well, and my heart sank as I reminisced back to when you and I were the same. An unsettling feeling began to lurch from within my stomach, so I kept the past at the back of my mind, and as far out of my vision as possible as I walked on ahead.

This wasn't a dream. There was no plausible end to what I faced.

You interrupted my stroll when I found you standing opposite me as I tried to make my way past. Assuming that you would move, I walked straight ahead, but with each step I took, I found you taking a step backwards, maintaining a consistent proximity between us. Despite our distance, you carried on with your conversation with her, as if I were invisible... but your subconscious recognised me, and wouldn't stand even an accidental bump into me.

This wasn't a dream.

I felt agitated and intensely humiliated at your refusal to move, but I continued to maintain a composed, calm complexion as I looked up towards you. You were taller than I expected, and you gestured at my best friend in response to her questions. Seeing your lively expressions caused me to flinch slightly, but despite what happened between us, I decided to keep it casual.

"Hey man, move over, why don't you!" I gestured playfully to the left, in hopes that you would resume your conversation without barricading me in between. Maybe I thought it was normal for acquaintances to joke, but maybe we weren't even acquaintances anymore.

... This was a nightmare.

Your frigid eyes pierced into my own, sending shivers down my spine and my playful smile quickly fading in response. Your amusement faded also; suddenly your expression became agitated and violent, and you grasped at my arm so hard that it almost bruised me. With a harsh grip, you thrust me around, swinging me out of your way as if I were a piece of worthless paper to throw in the trash.

I stumbled, but I quickly regained my step along the pebbled concrete, instantly thankful that I was saved from gauzes on my knees and elbows. However, your actions hurt me immensely. My heart stung, and I was disconcerted as I turned around to face you again. I bit my lip hard, forcing back tears of anger and shock. You turned a cold shoulder on me, and my heart plummeted into my stomach... The unsettled feeling from within was bursting out at my very seams.

"What was that for? I was trying to be nice...

"Why did you push me away?"

I blurted out each sentence with more stammer in each one than the last. I was already struggling to breathe; pools of emotion strangled against my mutilated thoughts, choking me and drawing all hydration from my mouth.
This wasn't a question you were prepared to answer; not in front of so many people. You knew that it wasn't about what just happened, because there was more to my question than you throwing me around like a toy.

You looked around, and simply said, "Er, I don't think so" with a tone so cold-hearted and distant that I'd felt my own heart freeze up. Once again, you turned your back towards me, and began to fade into black.

---
I woke up, alone in my bedroom, with tears streaming down my face. I could not comprehend it, nor could I control myself; I'd pulled at the tap's handle with all my might, but to no avail could I even move it an inch...

I managed to find a plug to hold the water in, though I knew it wouldn't last. I saw my best friend in the morning too, just when I'd managed to stop the tap from leaking... but it burst onto his shoulder, soaking him as well. Oh, I'm so sorry about that.

---
What scared me the most was that it was strikingly like my current reality...

But at least it wasn't real.

LOL, Sarah.
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