Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Through The Eyes Of An Observer.

Photography.

I guess for me, what's really special aren't those once-in-a-lifetime shots that are uncomprehendingly spectacular, with angles so perfect and balanced, light and shadow giving such a dazzling range of tone and rendering. It's not those breathtaking shots that millions would travel miles just for one day and stay up all night just to catch a glimpse of it, and yet there would only be a one in a million shots that would define perfection in all its glamour.

I like to think beauty is in every day, in every way, in every place and in every space (I'm on a rhyming role here). To me, it's not the greatest shots of all time, but rather, the everyday things you see, whether it be collection of your favourite things to the 'normal' grey skies we see in spring. Because I believe that each and every cloud formation is unique, and beautiful in its own way.

Who said art had to follow any structure or form to be beautiful? Who said art had to be exclusive? I say art is everywhere; it surrounds you and all it needs to be is taken through a lens. It doesn't matter how great your camera is, because even a phone camera can take shots that a DSLR can't.
Whoever said average isn't beautiful? (:

And maybe I'm being ignorant, because yes, once-in-a-lifetime shots are really only seen once-in-a-lifetime... and praise the Lord for people's God-given talents in capturing His masterpieces. But let's just say for once: Ignorance really is bliss. Because just look at the skies for once. The average, everyday, normal skies that are always with us... how hints and tints of blue seep through billows of darkened fluff, and yet the clouds maintain their heaven-like serenity with the soft blurs of white. They float up there, unhinged and unbound... and the rays of the sun escape their hold to bring warmth to the earth. We soak in the sun's heat, and we treasure the tears of the sky...... And we are relieved by the rainbow of promise that follows after the storm.

So, it's not all about the rarest shots in the world... well, not all the time at least (:

LOL, Sarah.
Average, everyday shots taken by me on my phone camera. (:

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Fragrant Essences.

It's my time to share tonight.
Ain't he cute? (:
Jeff Thomas, for all the hermits out there. British comedian, lovely humour, cute as.

Oh, and good sense of style :p.

---
I reckon this is pretty cool. Coldplay's pretty awesome.
- Strawberry Swing

---
So it seems I've run out of things to say,
And yet I keep speaking anyway.
Apparently songs express what our words can't
As emotions can be shown through your dance.

If I rewrote my own lyrics into mere words,
I don't think they would show their worth.
So I think I'll try with heavy remorse,
To give back to you what's already yours.

---
My throat has grown hoarse, and words no longer escape from my lips. My cough is dry and unsatisfying, and my vocal chords fail to reverberate how they usually would.
I feel so empty not singing ): I'm fine with not being able to talk... but not being able to sing? It's as if I have no medium left to express myself.

At the very least, I have this; words that could never possibly be articulated out loud, but the very essence of my thoughts laid out on a plain field for all to only see and enjoy.

And hopefully I'm successful in this.

LOL, Sarah.
Yes, the lyrics are dodgy and original. (:

Monday, September 28, 2009

Dancing Flames.


Perhaps I'm tired of this.

Perhaps... I'm just not graceful enough.

And yet like a strobe in the sky, a rainbow stretches over the blue-grey canvas and covers me with light. I am exposed, naked and yet unashamed, because I know that You are more than enough for me.

---
I'm like a child, seemingly innocent but stubborn in the arms of the One who loves me.

-
The thunders roared, and the rain attacked the earth with bullets of heavy droplets, pounding in on the benevolent soil. The earth saturated all it could muster, but the waters had a mind of their own as they began to flood the plains, drowning the flora of all their air- and their freedom.
The winds howled and shook the dome that protected us, but your firm hold refused to submit the umbrella to the winds' power. I huddled closer to you for your protection, and for the warmth that seeped out from your thick layer of clothes. I wasn't cold, but I shivered, scared by the violent storms that overwhelmed us.

-
Your arm came around me and pulled me close, and in your hand, you revealed to me a warmth that was so delicate and fragile; it sat in its humble container which your fingers protectively curved around, and opened.... you were encouraging me to hold it.

I glanced at you over and over with eyes so chaste, so mischievous as I watched the flame lick at the candle's wick, and thick drops of excess wax dripping from its caved in form. I carefully took the candle from your hand, and held it close to my eyes so I could examine it more closely. I dared not touch it; the warmth teased at me as it flickered against the winds, and I giggled at its dancing flame.

Suddenly, I wanted to run away. I pushed your warm physique away, and I kept the candle close to my face to keep myself warm instead. I couldn't look at you when I did, but I was convinced the this candle was enough to keep me warm. Quickly, I covered the tiny flame with my hand, and, holding it close, I began to run into the storms and into the darkness.

-
My light was limited, and the darkness was becoming eminent. Although the rain was light, my candle's flame was fading. It swayed and flickered with the soft howls of the wind, battling against the drizzle that threatened to eradicate my only source of light. I desperately tried to protect my flame, covering it from the soft sprinkles of water from above, but the wind was catching on from the side, and the candle's flame was slowly diminishing. I panicked when a sudden gust of wind send chills down my spine, and the flame disappeared for a split-second; I sighed in relief when I found a minuscule bud of light emitting from the wick . Tears budded in my eyes as I watched the flame struggle...

I was suddenly shaken by a malevolent rumble in the skies; off guarded, the candle slipped out of my hands, and landed in the mud. Suddenly, I had no light any more. The winds grew stronger, and the rain began to pelt down on me. Thunders began to roar, and lightning strikes surrounded me. I fell to my knees in weary fear, searching for my lost source of light. Tears were streaming down my face, but their warmth was quickly stolen by the rain's ice-cold drops. My hands fumbled around the slimy mud, and grabbed a hold of what once was my light.
Diminished, broken, and gone.

I was alone. No warmth, no shelter, and no light. I wailed and screamed in protest...

-
And I was suddenly scooped into your arms and sheltered by your umbrella. It was still dark, but the warmth from your body instantly calmed me down as you rushed me out of the storm. Cold and shivering, you brought me into a shelter and laid me by the fire...

I stared at the flames in fascination; they licked at the firewood as they danced in the fireplace. Odd pops and cracks sent tiny orbs of light in some directions, which quickly fizzled out as it hit the sand. The fire instantly warmed my heart, and in turn, began to warm my body. I slowly stopped shivering as I continued to stare at the flames, so thankful of its warmth, and its light...

And that it wasn't going to fade.

-
Without You, my fire will fade.
Keep me close, and make me willing to obey You.

LOL, Sarah.

Friday, September 25, 2009

TGIF.

It's Friday. Friday, Friday, Friday.

Hectic week. Happy that I got to spend quality time with some of the people who mean the most to me this week. And that I actually got some homework done. Win.

My nails still haven't fallen off yet. I'm kind of scared.
I feel like I haven't touched my computer in a loooooong time.
Might I add that I'm extremely bad a cropping photos.

And Uprising - Muse has really taken over. I failed to fine The Silver Cord. I need to be reminded tomorrow to call up Koorong and order it in. Hopefully my friend can pick it up. Excited!

Let's just say, I'm extremely exhausted.
I feel like I've been worn from all sides, and I'm no longer sharp, nor useful. Perhaps sometimes we are refined in our weaknesses so that we prove stronger than ever before.

LOL, Sarah.
Sorry about the randomness of this post.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Don't Fret, Just Fret.

New diary, new strings. Life couldn't be sweeter!

To Zanarkand and Sesame Street: The trademark songs.

Strutting my stuff with my fingers on the fretboard. Sweet!

LOL, Sarah.
That's all I really wanted to say.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Choices Of Initiation.

Just when I thought you couldn't sound sweeter... you just did.

---
I had a SWEET day today!

Went to Highpoint in the morning and watched UP in 3D YEAH! But they stuffed up the start. It didn't look 3D at first, but rather simply double imaging. I got so paranoid that it was where we were sitting (at the very back), that we moved to a closer spot. There was no difference apart from a slight angle in our view. The movie was 30 minutes in with a constant double-imaging, off hue inversions also snapping in and out from time to time, until the screen went blank and in walked a tall, smartly dressed man who addressed us that the computer which was screening our movie was having technical problems with the 3D monitoring, and we would have to wait a few minutes until they fix up this minor problem.
SO we waited about 10 minutes, and finally it was working. Whilst in the midst of complaining, scattered 'WOAHS' and 'COOL's were shouted from around the cinema as three-dimensional viewing commenced, followed by loud amount of annoyed 'shooshing' from the adults. What cute kids.

Still wondering about the start though.. about the clouds? Like, what the hizzeck? Oh well, it was so cute though.

And well, the movie was AWESOME. Apart from the technical difficulties. I kept the glasses. I feel like the awesomest person ever, because they look like nerd glasses and shades put into one. Epic.

---
Bought a new notebook afterwards. It's really pretty... and I'm still wondering if that $25 was worth the prettiness. I'm still weighing up the costs, even though I've already bought it.

---
Went to the city to meet up with an old friend. Haha OLD. (: We first went to eat Nando's, which was AWESOME, I'd been craving Nando's for SO long. And I'm hungry now thinking of it, dang it!
Then, after calling a CERTAIN SOMEONE about THREE TIMES with no avail to him PICKING UP, we went to Bourke street. There, I went to Artbox and bought a new pencil case, steel ruler and extra thin 4pen. Awesome! Goodbye Centrelink money!

I also saw a Monokuro Boo cup there, and I couldn't help but think about my brother. It was so pretty... so I bought it. Now I'm wondering whether I should have bought it, because nothing significant is coming up for him except for Christmas. Oh well. Early Christmas present!

---
Went to JB HiFi, and BOUGHT THE NEW MUSE ALBUM! I say it's worth the buy, having already tried.
However, I was shattered to hear that there were no The Classic Crime albums in stock. In no store. What. So. Ever. By this, I mean The Silver Cord. I felt so ragey after that. I'm DYING to buy that album. I want it so badly!

):
Oh well, hopefully on Thursday I can go get it when I go to Word.. I mean, IF I go to Word. (:

--
Bought new guitar strings. Could not sound any sweeter than it does right now. My heart is melting at every stroke, even if it's not as clear because of these beautiful fake nails which intrude my soft serenading to myself. I'm such a loser.

---
Then we went to have Max Brenner's. Mm, Tutti Frutti Waffles...

I see why only couples go on one-on-one outings now. There's simply too much time for just friends to be able to fill the lingering silence when a conversation ends.

Oh well, you learn something new everyday.

LOL, Sarah.
Don't you think that you could have initiated something?

Saturday, September 19, 2009

The First Day Of Spring...

What a nice day today.

I walked along the sunburnt landscape with a rather casual amble in my step. I was dauntingly relaxed, but I assumed it was just the rays of the sun, breaking through the lofty clouds and bathing me in its warmth. The grass bounced and tickled at the soles of my bare feet, bursting in yellows, greens and golds, and tiny red buds sprouted from the bustling overgrowth. A majestic rainbow stretched across the dome of blue, adorned with fluffy cushions of pale white and grey.

This wasn't a dream. A dream provides segments of solutions to end our problems.

I walked towards my best friend, who sat atop a playground painted with only the brightest and most innocent colours. You stood in front of her, seemingly to be in deep conversation... you both got along so well, and my heart sank as I reminisced back to when you and I were the same. An unsettling feeling began to lurch from within my stomach, so I kept the past at the back of my mind, and as far out of my vision as possible as I walked on ahead.

This wasn't a dream. There was no plausible end to what I faced.

You interrupted my stroll when I found you standing opposite me as I tried to make my way past. Assuming that you would move, I walked straight ahead, but with each step I took, I found you taking a step backwards, maintaining a consistent proximity between us. Despite our distance, you carried on with your conversation with her, as if I were invisible... but your subconscious recognised me, and wouldn't stand even an accidental bump into me.

This wasn't a dream.

I felt agitated and intensely humiliated at your refusal to move, but I continued to maintain a composed, calm complexion as I looked up towards you. You were taller than I expected, and you gestured at my best friend in response to her questions. Seeing your lively expressions caused me to flinch slightly, but despite what happened between us, I decided to keep it casual.

"Hey man, move over, why don't you!" I gestured playfully to the left, in hopes that you would resume your conversation without barricading me in between. Maybe I thought it was normal for acquaintances to joke, but maybe we weren't even acquaintances anymore.

... This was a nightmare.

Your frigid eyes pierced into my own, sending shivers down my spine and my playful smile quickly fading in response. Your amusement faded also; suddenly your expression became agitated and violent, and you grasped at my arm so hard that it almost bruised me. With a harsh grip, you thrust me around, swinging me out of your way as if I were a piece of worthless paper to throw in the trash.

I stumbled, but I quickly regained my step along the pebbled concrete, instantly thankful that I was saved from gauzes on my knees and elbows. However, your actions hurt me immensely. My heart stung, and I was disconcerted as I turned around to face you again. I bit my lip hard, forcing back tears of anger and shock. You turned a cold shoulder on me, and my heart plummeted into my stomach... The unsettled feeling from within was bursting out at my very seams.

"What was that for? I was trying to be nice...

"Why did you push me away?"

I blurted out each sentence with more stammer in each one than the last. I was already struggling to breathe; pools of emotion strangled against my mutilated thoughts, choking me and drawing all hydration from my mouth.
This wasn't a question you were prepared to answer; not in front of so many people. You knew that it wasn't about what just happened, because there was more to my question than you throwing me around like a toy.

You looked around, and simply said, "Er, I don't think so" with a tone so cold-hearted and distant that I'd felt my own heart freeze up. Once again, you turned your back towards me, and began to fade into black.

---
I woke up, alone in my bedroom, with tears streaming down my face. I could not comprehend it, nor could I control myself; I'd pulled at the tap's handle with all my might, but to no avail could I even move it an inch...

I managed to find a plug to hold the water in, though I knew it wouldn't last. I saw my best friend in the morning too, just when I'd managed to stop the tap from leaking... but it burst onto his shoulder, soaking him as well. Oh, I'm so sorry about that.

---
What scared me the most was that it was strikingly like my current reality...

But at least it wasn't real.

LOL, Sarah.
180909.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

For Good.

So, Mr. Best Friend...

I want to tell you that you're amazing. That you were so close to me when I was crawling up the mountains. That you drew me out of the depths, and guided me out of the abyss that I was drowning in. That your light helped to rekindle mine. That you pushed me to change; challenging me and pushing me further. That because of you, I'm so much stronger, and I'm such a different person, with strong morals and values. That no matter what, you're always supporting me and encouraging me. That you're my inspiration, my role model, my leader.

I want to tell you that I love you... and for the world not to judge with what they know about love. I'm sorry to say this so indirectly, but thank you for being a blessing, and only a blessing.

You're the best (:

---
There's so much more to relationships than the mutual attraction towards each other. If that's what it is, I would have none.

This is the first time I've said 'I love you' in a very long time...

But I mean it, and I could never regret it. Because relationships are so much more than just boyfriends and girlfriends. Relationships are everyone.

And when God is the centrefold of our relationships, only Love overflows.

LOL, Sarah.
Woo, new layout. Thanks so much for the help guys...
Not.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Nightmares Aren't Dreams.

They say that dreams are a collection of thoughts and emotions which illogically solve your troubles.

It's not something to comprehend, but something to accept, and to keep your mind and body at peace. It will keep you asleep in quiet harmony.

The mind is cunning, and will protect you from all dangers. Problems leave you unsettled and unable to sleep, and nightmares cause your heart to race in panic and fear.

But that's what dreams are for. Dreams are our imaginary solution to the dilemmas we face.

If even our dreams can't fit their jigsaw piece into our missing hole and our deepest fears come alive, our bodies know that it's time...

It's time to wake up.

---
So, you're back, and you've come to haunt me in my dreams again. Are you the solution by which I wish to be warped back to the beginning of all this... the beginning of your dominance in my mind?

I do, but only if you lead me.
LOL, Sarah.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Philia.

Draw near to me, and hold me in your warm embrace.

He lumbered across like a shadow so subtly that I almost missed his ghostly presence. His footsteps were quiet as he ventured around the kitchen, floating between the fridge and the sink, pausing, and doing so again. I almost forgot that he was there as my music droned on, my focus ebbing away as I began to drift into a light daydream. That is, until his voice snapped my back to reality.

"So, any news?" He asked, "... you know. Got the results?"

My gazed didn't shift from the pixels of light in front of me because I was still dreaming, but I tilted my head towards him and nodded. I continued to stare at my screen, half awake, before realising that he was still talking to me.

His voice went from fuzzy to clear, "And..."

And again, it droned out for another second before I snapped back into reality. I shifted my focus on him, and tuned to the remainder of his sentence.

"... You get it?" He continued to float around the kitchen, seemingly aimlessly, and filled up a glass cup with some milk. He didn't seem to notice my temporary lack of attention... Good. I lazily shook my head, and narrowed my eyes enough so that I could only make out blurred shapes. This way, I didn't have to recognise his disappointed response to be written all over his face. I had no idea why, but I suddenly began to laugh nervously; but I felt pressured about hearing his solemn, despondent voice. I turned back towards my screen in awkward embarassment, unable to contain the splutters of my nervous laughter.

"It.. it's probably beacuse I didn't want it enough.. and well yeah. I could have, but didn't..." I couldn't manage to clarify my sentence as I stammered. It was like a choking feeling, where the words were stuck in my throat against a sudden build up of thoughts that refused to be released.

I squeezed my eyes shut, and miserably tormented my own mind. I, who was usually so cool and so calm, couldn't even muster up a sentence, despite all this experience at public speaking, creative writing and the like. Just plain stupid.

There was an awkward silence for but a moment, and I dared to peek towards him; he roamed around, now with a biscuit in his hand. He turned away for a moment before turning back towards me. I anxiously awaited his response... my guard already let down and already preparing for the mental beat up that I was about to be confronted with.

"... Oh well", he said simply, "Their loss".

And, ending with that, he ambled up the stairs, and returned to his room.

---
I love my brother. (:

Monday, September 14, 2009

Rays of Beauty.

You know what? I feel like a change. I don't even like the colour blue. So who's offering to change my template for me? Free Rocky Road chocolate is for the winner (they must know how to edit, and change the whole thing completely themselves... don't just give me the html dudes).


---
The car spluttered to life, and soon we were on the move. The car itself seemed to struggle as it bumped its way down the suburbian streets, but I didn't mind; the car was a jewel to me, journeying me through the wonders of life. I gazed at the horizon - it was seemingly far off, and my view was disturbed by constant roofs that invaded the serene sight. The constant breaks soon became repetitive and nonchalant, and soon I began to daydreamed...

I envisioned what this day would entail, what I would be confronted by in relationship terms, the routinely work that had already been laid out for me, and the inevitable list of need-to-dos when I arrived home... early, of course. Then there was the result of the interview, by which I almost didn't care anything for any longer. My thoughts shifted towards things present, and things to come, the plans that God visioned me for my school in its final years...

A sudden rush of adrenalin sent me back to reality as the car's speed dramatically increased in making its way down a rather large slope. A forest of green flashed before my eyes, and enveloped my from every direction. I was awestruck at the sudden life of my surroundings, where tall, green branches waved at me as they swayed in the wind, and shrubs bobbed and bounced to greet me in their soft, cushiony form. Hints of bright reds, yellows, pinks, and blues fluttered about the trees, dancing around and teasing at their majestic branches.

It was as if new life had begun from under the quilt of dark, desolate quietness, the time had finally come for light to be shed, and the forest to blossom once again.

Hello, spring.

---
Written in Indonesian woot!

I'm realising that the less I'm "online" on MSN, the more frequently I use Facebook. Not a good sign. I have a Methods SAC tomorrow, and I haven't bothered to study.
But hey! At least I finished my English pieces.


LOL, Sarah.
Against nature, there is simply nothing that compares to its beauty.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Heartless Permeation.

Where were you when everything was falling apart?
You Found Me
The Fray.

---
You can blame me for what you've lost, suffered, and endured. I know it was painful, and I was being ignorant. I'm just sorry, but that won't change things, will it?

---
My mind wandered about aimlessly whilst my subconscious dictated my actions; I moved with no purpose, no reason, and no motivation. My most frequently visited sites didn't appeal to me, but I clicked through them anyway, in hope for any sort of satisfaction- no, medication- to battle this swelling laziness and boredom that I was suffering. I acknowledged that there were things that needed to be done, and yes, whilst it concerned me, I didn't seem to care enough to pan my motivation towards that area. I was fine with being apathetic... It'd become my new reality.

I soon gave up on my usually most favoured site, despite its many tasteful distractions and temptations that would further skew my perception of the very near, very demanding reality. I instead opened up my contact list; I wasn't looking for a conversation with anyone in particular (I've lost desire to speak on MSN these days), nor was I hoping for a certain person to be online. I instead skimmed through for any links I could navigate through, explore and feed my disinterested mind; I'd found a couple of links to my friend's tumblrs...

*click, click*
*reads, scrolls down, reads further*
*click*

Soon enough, I'd weaved my way through to my most loved friend. I paused for a moment in slight surprise, but then shook myself in disappointment. It's obvious that I wouldn't know whether she had a tumblr or not.

I began to read her posts, one-by-one, skimming through familiar pictures and quotes on the plain, simple page. My ebbing tiredness was slipping away, and soon my mind became fully alert as it absorbed the words which stretched across the stark-white page; so simple, yet so alluring.

A pain had struck me at that moment as I furiously clicked through the remainder of her posts, which inevitably came to an abrupt end. I stopped for a moment, and felt my heart begin to sink as I allowed my mind to digest the words I'd read.

What more was there to it? I didn't know her at all, and yet I'm still too proud, arrogant and closed minded, calling her my very own.

... So much of me is made up of what I'd learned from you.
- For Good; Wicked Soundtrack

But we're too different now... or we always were, and I'd just refuse to face the reality that we were in two different worlds that only intersected every once in a blue moon.

---
I swear, there are these little fly things that keep flying around in the corner of my eye- they're driving me nuts- I've already killed at least 5 already. Now my hands hurt, and my eyes are twitching in annoyance.

---
Blame PMS.

LOL, Sarah.

Friday, September 11, 2009

She's Such A...

You were special, from the very first.

- You actually look into my eyes when we speak, and it really scares me.

- I hope you realise that I can't actually do everything by myself; there's a reason I asked you.

- I wish I'd never met you, so then I wouldn't have to put up with the secret heartache of seeing you with someone else.

- My problem with you is that I'm asphyxiated, and you're not even mine.

---
Words can't express the joy I feel in eating McDonald's after 3 whole week's worth of deprivation from my favourite foods:

- Large 10 pack nugget meal w/ water and 2x sweet thai chili sauce
- Cheeseburger
- Apple pie
- Cone
- Frozen Coke

Yup, I had all of and everything from that list for my dinner just then. All in one sitting. ^^ I am completely satisfied.

LOL, Sarah.

Sleaze.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Athazagoraphobia.

I do, I do, I do, I miss your singing too.

Like water.
It is easily refined and changed according to its environment. Water depends on what it is exposed to so that it can determine its form. Like ice - when it is exposed to heat, it will eventually melt, and conform to the warmth of its surroundings.

But are we not eternally refined by the fire of God? We are like ceramic jars, molded by compassionate hands, carefully shaped and detailed with immense intricacy; not a detail is misplaced or mistaken. We are then challenged and pressured in the kiln, where we do not melt, but we stand in the furnace with the angels of God, protected, unburnt, but refined and proved stronger than gold.

Like a tree; unwavering against the harshest of howling winds, or a house built on steady foundations; standing against the strong waves.

Like His will and purpose, complete and unchanging.

What are you like?

---
I drool a lot. ): What a turn-off, right? At least I'm normal and acknowledge my faults, for all you perfection-seekers out there. Sorry, I'm not for you.

---
I want a series of bow-clips. One in each colour of the rainbow, and a cream one.

My black bow-clip broke. It was tattered and torn... and it fell out of my hair so subtly that I hadn't even noticed. I must have passed it by a number of times before he noticed, and picked up the crippled bow, and nicely handed it to me.

Must you be so nice? Really. Must you?

LOL, Sarah.
PS. Please don't let me stop you from being happy.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Brilliance.

I'm sorry, Blogworld. I'll be back in a moment.

I'm jealous of happy Larry. He can always be happy with everything he has.

LOL, Sarah.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

These Little Moments.

I remember the days where tweeting something only birds would do.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. That made my day.

Which reminds me that I still have a Twitter. I haven't touched it in a month. Which also reminds me of Farmville on Facebook. Yes, I made one, and I haven't touched it since. I don't plan to. Restaurant City is enough for me.

---
Presentation Ball.

AWESOME so much so that words can't express. :) So I won't go into any more detail, except for the fact that all I said literally all day was "Omgosh I love your dress! Your hair is so beautiful! You're stepping on my dress!"

It was grand.

-
I got my nails done... I swear the lady was out to kill me. She made me bleed 4 times, and when she did, all she said was 'sorry' and continued to make it bleed. Her glasses were so thick, I swear she was blind.

And it took one hour, not half, Jackie! Gosh, get your facts right! Haha :)

-
It was such a rush to get through yesterday. I forgot at least one thing in every place we went to that day...
And I lost the bracelet my best friend gave me for my birthday.

Sad.

-
I got a photo, woo! (;

-
Red carpet experience getting into and out of the limousine. I felt so beautiful.

But you aren't loved just because of your looks, I guess.

---
I hate it when my dad's drunk, but it's Father's day so I guess there's no excuse.

LOL, Sarah.

PS. Dangit, I missed blogging yesterday. Ohwells. I'm really tired, so this is just a lazy post. (Y)

Friday, September 4, 2009

Dearest Darlingest Best Friendsforlife,

IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KATHY PHAM.
I'm so proud to see my little shmeo grow up *sniffs*.

Even though you're older than me, thatsnot the point.. the point is you're growing more beautiful each and every day, and I'm proud to be your meo owner (hah, year nine).

I should write in your birthday card. Especially since I'm delirious atm because you're 17!!!!! :D

I love you. :D

Yoursnotververyveryniceindeedy.


Everything's epic when you're feeling hyperactive. Especially if you're singing songs from the 'Wicked' soundtrack.

LOL, Sarah.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Speculating Invasions.

Your words are like music to my ears.

Three things I thought of this morning. My bed was unusually warm, given that for the past three months, I've had to face the winter cold biting against my inevitably exposed face as I fought against my lethargic body to open my groggy eyes and rub the sleep away. I woke up with warmth's embrace around me, as if I'd fallen back into the arms of my lover (not really, but someone I love) who simply oozed in a warming glow. To my devastation, it was simply my electric blanket, as well as the fact that it happened to be the beginning of spring.

Secondly, as was routine, I was woken up by the sudden mash of my two musical alarms; a compilation of music to which I was unable to sleep through on my iPod, and the repeated shrills of an all too catchy song from my phone. This mash was different to previous ones; I remembered that I had changed it the night before, and grumbled at the discomfort that it caused me. Too lazy to move, I decided to try and sleep through it anyway, despite its impossibilities of doing so (through God, all things are possible, right? It worked).

Lastly, it had hit me that it was a school day, and, once again, I'd not accumulated enough hours of sleep to get me through the day. My heart sank at this fact, which led to my fatigued body longing to sink even deeper into the warmth of my electric blanket's embrace. I was overwhelmingly tired, and despite the demands of life, I'd turned away and shut my eyes - ignoring the droning of my alarms - in hopes to restore the hours of my sleep to a satisfactory level again.

I was bombarded by these thoughts from all directions, thinking through each at the same time... so maybe this is how Edward Cullen's mind must have worked; a million contemplations played out in his mind, filing through logical solutions and meditating thoroughly on each, whilst the larger part, of course, rationalised ways of not sucking the life of his love away.

Thank God I'm not a vampire.

Although I know my potential in draining away the life of my love. What a scary, scary thought.

LOL, Sarah.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Frivolous Discernment.

Haven't you heard? That the bird's the word?!

So, where's the little bluebird who sits on our shoulders spilling out endless facts, and thereafter zipping away, leaving us to decipher the difference between truth and fact?

I don't know. Ask someone else.

---
Howdy, stranger. If I'd met you in another life, I think we could have been friends. But when you've got nothing, you've got nothing to lose, right? Riiight.

---
I'm that child who wants to run away from life, from everything. Irritating, detestable brat forever on the apex of an nonobligatory emotional roller coaster. Highs of heights higher than the largest Ferris Wheel in the world (architects should really have thought of the state of weather in Melbourne. Those silly Europeans), and lows deeper than the unforeseen depths of the ocean (I realise I've been referring to anything to do with water... it's just a phase).

Whatever my thoughts may become, they are irrational, unnecessary and blown dramatically out of proportion. Like a child, dreaming of the world as an oyster in his hands, attempting to pry it open with his own hands to receive its hidden treasure (the child thing is also a phase... but I like it so deal with it). But I'm short tempered, impatient and precarious of my own surroundings. I'm a child, giving up, and running away.

So foolish as to think no one would care.

So immature as to think I deserve more than this.

---
And yet there is nothing I can complain about. I have nothing to lose. I can't help but think that I've got it easy.

It's all about Him.

LOL. Sarah.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Like A Child; Abundance.

There is nothing more fulfilling to me than praising my Lord God, by which His love abounds in us so abundantly and exceedingly.

As promised to Amy Nhan, to which I would once again begin my blogging extravaganza. I have no clue as to the meaning of what I wrote just then.


---
Despicable. Only two posts an entire month? ONLY TWO?! Horrific. Unbelievable. Disappointing. FAIL.

Hello world, this is me. Life should be fun for everyone. - Saddle Club fun!

---
I am like a child on a journey towards an unknown destination walking hand in hand with You. Young, curious, and vulnerable.

"Look ahead! Focus!" your stern voice echoed in my mind, but I indignantly ignored it as I continued to appraise the silken texture of a single, lone-standing rose. Its brilliant vermilion petals, arced so delicately as the flower proceeded in full bloom perplexed me, each petal carved to perfection in overlapping the other, concealing a hidden secret under its layers. I longed to study the satin-feel of the petals between my fingers; its deep, rich red contrast to my pale skin. I stretched my arm towards the flower, and its body brushed against my skin as the wind aptly pushed against its anatomy. The velvet-like texture tingled against the pores of my skin, giving me a warm, pleasing sensation; a simple touch made my heart flutter in curiosity and wonder. I smiled, and lean closer so that I was within reach of lifting the rose from its roots, where fertile soil surrounded the base of the flower.

Suddenly, as I was about to close my hand around the stalk of the rose, my entire body was jerked and lifted from the ground. Your grip on my other hand was gentle, but firm, and I stumbled into your side as you pulled me away from the flower. I squirmed around in protest, straining for freedom from your grasp, though I knew that despite my best efforts, it was pointless, for your grip on my hand was firm and unwavering. I turned towards you in frustration, and frowned as I met your eyes; glaring, I sought for reasoning behind your restrictions on my behaviour. I quivered suddenly as a tinge of guilt zapped throughout my body; your expression was stressed and tired, your lips pursed, and the corners of your mouth only slightly upturned in attempt to convey your patience for me. The pools of chocolate brown surrounded by milky white conveyed such a love as I glared at you; I looked away in guilt, irritated at your love for me.

You heaved a large sigh, and placed your free hand on my head. I flinched slightly, but soon relaxed as you continued to comb my frazzled hair into place, and loosened your grip on my hand. In a soft, tired voice, you murmured, "Be careful", and turned towards our destination. You began walking, and I realised that you'd given me the chance of freedom. I almost yelped for joy before turning back towards the rose. I knelt down beside it, and impetuously wrapped my hands around it in an attempt to pull it out of the ground. I didn't notice the hidden blades of thorns that lined against the stem of the flower until I felt sharp pains instantly whizzed through my arm from my hand. I w immediately withdrew my hand from the rose, and examined numerous spots of exposed skin, where blood began to dribble. The flower was uprooted, and lay next to me; I took no notice of it, as the ache in my hand began to increase, and a pool of blood made its way into the palm of my hand.

I couldn't comprehend it. My eyes began to water, and I subconsciously retreated my posture into a hunched ball, all the while holding my hand in pain. I couldn't control my sudden downcast emotion, and I hid my head in embarrassment and humility. I didn't want you to see me like this, because I knew you'd be disappointed in me. I began to sob; soon I couldn't control myself at all as the pain grew and tears began to overflow.

A rush of wind blew against my hair, and I was suddenly scooped from the ground, and deep into your chest, where your arms barricaded me protectively. You took my damaged hand and wrapped it firmly in a silken, stark white cloth, and with another, you wiped the tears from my eyes. You began to walk forwards, carrying me in your steadfast arms, but I squirmed in your embrace as I looked back at the single rose left on the pathway. You noticed my urging for the flower, but you resumed walking, and, in a comforting voice, once again said, "Look ahead".

As we turned at the corner of the street, you revealed to me a vast array of flowers, ranging from brilliant red roses to the softest lilac orchids, arranged in a beautiful garden. The scene was breathtaking, and I was overwhelmed with such wonder, joy, and amazement.

With a smile in your voice, you whispered into my ear, "We're here, my child".

---
What you have for me is so much more.

Isn't this exciting? This is part of the 'Like A Child' Series. :)

LOL, Sarah.