Picture Perfect.

"You make me want you."

If I didn't love Jesus, I'd be swearing my head off right now. I would have punched a dozen holes in the wall, broken a table, and thrown a chair across my room past the rainbow dividers to the desolate other half of my room. My eyes would have been blood red and too asian to even recognise that they were, my hair would be mangled as if there were a cat fight in the midst of it, and my eyeliner would have bled out from every known angle that man has discovered.

But there's an awkward silence right now. You don't know what to say to all this. Here I am, contemplating the difference of my life without My Love, and you read on, astonished, bemused, critical, and devious. (I used words beginning with the alphabet for emphasised effect). There's really nothing to say about it. 'You go, girl' is kind of off-putting, because it's obvious that I'd lost all sense of feminine aspect of myself in that spur of overloaded impulse. 'F-oath, you're emo' is not specific enough, let alone hypocritical. Who hasn't cried themselves to sleep before? In fact, I want to slap the next person who does, and tells me about it. Back to what I was saying.

Then again, I'd realised this: If I didn't have Jesus, none of this would have ever happened. My life would be completely different. I wouldn't think this way, talk that way, and act another way. I'd probably be a slut, but then I'd probably never even met half the guys I know now. I probably wouldn't give a damn about school, although regardless, I'd still do well (haha, hate me, suckers). I know one thing though- you'd expect filthy, dirty, words from the overflow of my heart through my voice with every second word I'd say. Why? It's an epic battle in my head to swallow the vomit from my heart so that I'd avoid making a mess of everything, and anyone around me (yay, an analogy; think about it).

So I'm pretty happy with that. I thank God that I am who I am, because it scares me so much when I'd imagine myself without Him.

And it's obvious where I could have let my spew out in this blog right here.

'All my friends turned away from me. Now, give me your damn attention, and help me pick up my broken life.' - It's hard not to take your friends for granted, when OBVIOUSLY, they're not listening to you, isn't it?

"You make me want you". Please darling, I love how dramatic you make my life feel now, but there's a point where it's getting really stupid. You're pretty far ahead of it now.

Over it, over you.

But then again, you're not really over it, are you; when you say you are? Because when you're over it, you're regarding 'it' as the thing you're over. Hence, you're still thinking about 'it'.

Sorry for the irregular blogs. I try to keep my life interesting, but sometimes, it doesn't want to.

LOL, Sarah.

There are no knobs on my guitar! Argh!