White Liar.

It's been bothering me.

I keep thinking back to last week; that evening where we just sat in the car, listening to smooth tunes of John Mayer.

I thoroughly enjoyed the peace whilst I was with you; that is, until you challenged me with the simplest of questions, stuttering my speech and entirely overwhelming with the suppressed emotion I kept so quietly until now. I couldn't look at you, and I couldn't answer you straight away. I could not bring myself to lie to you, but I simply could not tell you the truth of the effects of the events of my past week. I instantaneously zoned out on the question in effort to shrug it off, but you persisted, your concern ringing through the air as you almost nervously asked for my assurance that I had been alright.

No matter how I tried, I could not bring myself up to giving you the truth. Disconcerted, I barely mumbled the words you just needed to hear. My speech became slurred, and shaken as I tried to tell you the lie as truthfully as I could for what it was worth. You accepted it, and flowed on towards better conversation as I looked out the window, with an egg of self loathing hatching once again within my heart.

I don't know why I lied, nor do I know why I can't face up to it.

It's just been bothering me.

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The word "love" has become overused, overlooked, misinterpreted, misused, disregarded and underestimated.



It's funny how some of the closest people to us are so far away, and the ones that we consider closest and close are close with so many others, not giving us the time to be even closer , and yet the one's that aren't so close seem to be our only close friends. We wish we were closer, but the ones close we aren't so close with at all...



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Gosh, I'm so desperate to keep up with my blog posts as to stoop as low as going back to the very basis of my beginnings of the world of blogging: MySpace.

Written 2 years ago.

LOL, Sarah.
Please, just flood me with pure water, not the polluted seas of oil and debris.