Humane Desire.

I FORCED LIGHT INTO MY VISION as I struggled to create slits through my heavy eyes. I hadn't realised that I had been asleep for so long. I tried and failed to stir myself from where I lay. My eyes drooped, and I drifted in and out of sleep until the line between my fantasy and my reality could not be distinguished.

I opened my eyes to a well-lit room. I recognised that the light was, suspended on a wooden beam that stretched across the ceiling. There was nothing out of the ordinary of this room, only that it looked so strangely familiar. I was still in bed, curved in a stiff, upright position against the wall. My whole body was tense, and every muscle tightened around my bones, making me forget to breathe. Without noticing, I clenched my hands into tight, white fists beside my body and snapped my jaw together. I was frozen, and I could only move my eyes, examining the figure that had suddenly stood in front of me.

I could not take my eyes off his face. Light freckles scattered across the bridge of his nose and cheeks, which were pale, but full of life. His full lips were curved into a slight, smug smile, but didn't disturb his smooth complexion. His light, copper brown hair framed his face, bouncing slightly to create a careful, curly mess on his head. But it was his eyes that mesmerized me. A cheeky hazel brown pierced into my eyes, as if mine were made of glass. Full of life and reflection, his eyes seemed to smile along with his face. I was still tense, but I could not relieve myself of it. I could not take my eyes off his.

He chuckled slightly, letting me catch a glimpse of his brilliant white teeth. I panicked as he leaned forward towards me, supporting himself by placing his hand gently next to my clenched fist. He laughed at my reaction, and leaned further until his head was rested just under my neck. My heart thumped loudly and clumsily, seeming to be just as alarmed and tense as I felt. He smiled as he closed his eyes, listening to the unsteady beat of my heart.

My fists were now unclenched, and they lightly ran through the ruffles of his messy curls. I could not comprehend his actions, but I was okay with it. After all, this is what I wanted, wasn't it? It was as if he had heard my thoughts, because he gently lifted his hands and wrapped his arms around my waist, his hands smoothly tracing small circles on the small of my back. I stiffened again, but only for a short while; his hands were relieving the stress in my body.

"You need to loosen up," He murmured. His voice sounded more like a thought in my head, but I knew that he had said it. "It's kinda hard," I mumbled, suddenly worried that my weight may be crushing his hands. But they weren't; one hand followed the curve of my spine, the other continuing to circle the my lower back, then soon following. I inhaled sharply, and he gently lifted his head, his eyes gazing into mine.

"I'm only trying to massage you,"He chuckled again, slightly louder and more amused. He leaned closer to my face; his smile smug as he leaned to bury his head in the curve of my neck and shoulder. He lifted me, and released his grip of my body. I suddenly exhaled, and he shook slightly as he laughed again. I was getting tired of his laughing now. I was humiliated, but my thoughts deterred as he hugged at my shoulders, massaging them now. I sighed, leaning my head forward, then sideways so that my cheek rested on his hair. I still could not move the rest of my body.

Suddenly, he let me go, straightening himself as he sat next to me. I fell slightly, hitting my head on the metal frame at the top of my head. I cringed slightly, and glared at him. He chuckled at my reaction. "I know your scent now," he mused, instantly reminding me of Twighlight, "that's all I wanted". He got up and took a step away from me. I watched him, and he turned around to meet my pleading eyes. I didn't want him to go just yet, even though I was content. He smiled again, but his eyes were deadened.

I woke up, again.

~~~

I love my dreams. I reckon I could create a whole story with just them. But I'm thankful that they are just dreams.

LOL, Sarah.

Love-accentuating Light.

"Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond imagination. It is our light more than our darkness which scares us." - Marianne Williamson; Return to Love: Reflections on a Course in Miracles.

Guest speaker at school came today. I took not too much interest in it other than the fact that he travelled to India and things happened. He also pulled out this quote at the start, saying that we're afraid of the differences we can make.

I don't think that's the case, but this is from my point of view. I believe that we fear to express our power and ability to create a difference because we're scared to actually show our light (actually, God's light). We're afraid that in this dark world, when we reflect His light, people will be disgusted by us; they feel more than comfortable feeling around with the little light they have. That is, they are comforted by the surrounding darkness, where they are easily able to hide their flaws; it's easy to conform.

So basically (I don't know what else to say) I just wanted to point out that we're scared of spreading light to a world full of darkness because we're afraid of being hated by people who never wished for light to be shed upon them.

"Folks don’t like to have somebody around knowing more than they do. It aggravates them. You’re not going to change any of them by talking right, they’ve got to want to learn themselves, and when they don’t want to learn there’s nothing you can do but keep your mouth shut or talk their language." - Calpurnia; To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee.

I can't believe I used this quote T_T I hate To Kill A Mockingbird, but only because it's so immensely detailed. But it kinda goes with what I'm saying.

Yeah. That's all.

Updates: MY OTHER PICTURE IS FINISHED. I'M SO HAPPY. Not really. I really still don't like it, but I suppose it's alright. // My scar has lost all scabs. It's just pinky purple now. Eurgh.

I've realised... I lost my format :(. So much stuff to cram in and stuff. It's pretty hardcore. At least I know what to write now!

Thanks Tony for yesterday. It's so frustrating when you write a short story, and as soon as the words "I love you" pop out, EVERYONE immediately thinks that you like someone, or that you wanna be with someone 'in that way'. No offense (actually no take this as badly as you can), but that's really shallow. I don't understand how you can think that just because I love someone, it means that I wanna be with them. My friendships are so much deeper and are so much more meaningful, and I've made myself clearer than crystal clear that I have absolutely no intentions of even liking anyone. Everyone knows how over I am with boys anyway. I seriously don't understand why people would assume things and create reasonable doubt about something I had already explained many times before.

So yeah, it's nothing; NOTHING even remotely close to being 'in-like' with someone. It's about a friendship. And yes, friendships do go that deep. I'm actually beginning to think that friendships are deeper than relationships from a third person's point of view.

I just needed to get that out of the way. I'm sick of people lingering with thoughts of "OOOH SARAH LIKES SOMEONE". I really dislike it.

So much anger in this blog! Sorry guys, it just got on my nerves. Ahh. I need ice-cream. Quick quick! Yeah I'm hungry. I eat too much. I'm getting fat.

This is such an emo blog. Oh, but you'll never guess. For the past few days, I've been having Bold as Love (John Mayer's cover) in my head. Now you're probably thinking, uh, isn't that normal? Everyone gets a song stuck in their head. Dur. Even I do and all I do is cry (Haha jokes). Yeah, it's normal, especially for me, because I love music. HOWEVER. Here is the thing: I don't really know the lyrics. For example, this is me reciting it now:

Anger!
He smiles something
Something
Queen Jealousy, envy waits behind her
Something
Who are the life-giving waters
Taken for granted
..

They're all bold as love

Haha yeah, it's terrible. That's what's so interesting about having the song in my head. You see, it's not the lyrics that get stuck in my head (however, ANGER randomly pops into my head when I'm sometimes feeling it, and I start singing poorly recited lyrics), but the solo of that song is what gets stuck in my head; I know it off by heart.

Ask Kathy, she knows. It's funny, coz out of nowhere I start dancing with an air guitar, as if playing the solo.

Question: How do you read someone's eyes? I never really understood when books said something like this (poorly quoting from Twighlight; Stephenie Meyer: He smiled his crooked smile, but it didn't reach his eyes.

I don't get it! I reckon it's stupid. I mean, I think it's more the stance and the body language that tells you about how people feel, not so much their eyes. And yeah. That's all for now. Answer ze question!

LOL, Sarah.

Realism.

The beach didn't feel very 'beachy', I suppose. Its' yellow surface was smooth, and somehow perfect; uninterrupted and still, even with the mass gathering, walking alongside the shore that seemed to emcompass and consume the foundation of which I stood. The waves seemed unrealistic as well; constantly threatening to crush me with their immense crest outlined with brilliant white foam. A few times, they succeeded, drenching me; I was on the ground the second I was overwhelmed by it. It wasn't a wave of water; its' heavy body seemed dry and warm. By the time I had gotten up, the waves returned to water. It was strange that everyone walked towards what almost killed me.

But you where there. And it was okay for me for you to be there. I felt no sensation, warm or cool, but in my heart I was content. As long as you were there. I knew you were watching over me; I knew you cared.

But you left me, your apologetic glance piercing my heart. "I have to go see where she is," you said, suggesting your best friend, "I'll be right back". Your voice warmed my numbened heart, and your "promise" lingered pleasantly in my mind, so I wasn't fazed. I was so sure you were going to come back.

But you didn't.

And it hurt me. I went to look for you; you were in the crowd, along with the many other faces I had become so familiar with. They were all your friends; all my friends, her. It hurt me, but I ignored it, because I know that you can't always be there for me. There were so many others under your wing; they needed care. They needed love. And they needed it from you.

So it was okay. Our mass walked along the now cement path; somehow we were warped from the beach to a busy road lined with shops. Dull, but alive with people rummaging for ornaments and products which they may or may not find useful. Antiques were popular in many of these worn down shops.

You were next to me again; my numb heart was content. You allowed me to cling to your arm as we continued down along the path. You seemed to know that you were the only one I felt that I could hold onto. I knew I looked like a clingy attention-seeker. I didn't care; because that spills the truth. I needed you, and this was the rarest time I could spend acknowledging your presence. I wanted you to know how much I loved you.

We entered a shop. I found myself wearing the jacket that you had given me a while ago. Shrugging it off and leaving it aside, I hugged your arm as I followed you through the shop. It was a vietnamese grocery store.

We left, but seconds later returned. I had forgotten the jumper. A lady with smooth black hair pulled back into a ponytail was behind the wooden counter. Her eyes were a dark brown, almost black, and I tried to understand what that meant. I was never really good at reading people's eyes. She met my gaze and turned around, picking up a blue and yellow school jacket, folded neatly in her arms. She smiled as she gave it to me; I suppose I had stared for a bit too long. I smiled politely, thanking her with courteous detachment.

I found you again, and sighed as I took ownership of your arm again.

But then everything disappeared.

And I was awake.

~~~

:) It's pathetic. I'm utterly horrible at descriptive pieces. But I suppose the more I write, the better I get.
...
So not true. But yeah. It's a dream I had. And no, it's not about someone I "like-like", whatever that means. It's a lot deeper than that.

Dreams are always a bit far-fetched, don't you think?

LOL, Sarah.

Blind.

Fade from white; it's there again. Slightly angled, an awkward angle, close-up and macroed. Its' small, blue frame could not contain the vast complexity of its' content. The small, green oval shapes seemed to show depth on a two-dimensional surface; clear, but fading into a slight blur as the square seemed to become smaller. But it wasn't the frame getting smaller, it was the angle of the camera, entirely focusing on its' closest subject. The raw background was still gridded with light grey lines; unfinished, spotted with bizarre shapes that seemed to form into fruit. But it was all a blur.

And it's heart-wrenching to even look at it.

DAMN, I MISS MY PICTURE SO MUCH. I absolutely despise the current picture I'm doing. It's simplicity and strange misformation disgruntles me.

HAHA. My sad attempt at sounding smart. :(

Why is a Blind Seer called the "Blind Seer" if it can't see?

LOL, Sarah.

A Hole in the Jumper.

"Honey," mum called to me, holding a very small needle in one hand and a piece of thread extended from a whole cone wrapped with thread in the other, "Can you do this for me? I can't see the hole".

"Sure," I said shortly. I stood in front of my mum, and I took the needle and thread. It wasn't the brightest or most efficient place to be standing, for I was between the kitchen and the dining room, but the kitchen had no light on. The dining room had plenty of strong mandmade light, but I stayed where I was.

"Go into where the light is, you'll see better," mum said as I started trying to poke the thread into the half a milimetre hole. I refused, "I don't need the light." After a few tries, I got it in, where I stood, between light and dark. I gave the needle with tread hanging limply from it to my mum, and she began to fix up that hole in my school jumper that I had for nearly 4 years. The hole only bothered me because people began to notice only this year. This term.

~~~

I suppose I'd realised that standing where I was, between light and dark. I'd had enough light to see what I wanted to see. But claiming that I don't need light, I become blind to a lot of things, because there are things I simply don't see.

But I've chosen what I want to see. And this explains the lot of it.

Voluminous Accent.

Updates: Scar is healing. It's rough, but healing. // Still no progress on the picture. Still looking to start a new one. Should probably get it soon.

Word of the day: Disgruntled. Most definitely disgruntled.

I suppose I should have spent this Saturday with myself and God. People are so bothersome and nosey sometimes. I'm really not in the mood for blogging today. But I had such an awesome idea before. Now I forgot it. Oh well. On another hand, I've created some sort of layout for my blog: Updates and Word of the day. Yay! I'm getting organised. Also I've begun an introduction (this is this paragraph), and every blog will probably be likely to have some sort of thing with a point to ponder, or explain something about me. However, you will never get to know me fully.

Wanna know me? Get to know Christ. :) I wanna live by that.

~~~

Words could not explain how OVER I am with boys (note: BOYS is the keyword >_<). Anyway, next topic. I shall not explain, but in saying what I just wrote, I vented. Kind of. Be happy Aiball. :)

~~~

As a singer, I find that I put a lot more effort into singing higher pitches, and being more voluminous. This may be because perhaps that part of the song requires that amount of strength in my voice. In singing higher pitches, I have to, if not need to, put a lot more in. And upon reflecting upon this, I've realised that I can't sing as good if I'm not singing for God and really getting into worship+praise with my voice. I'm not really sure why. But that's the way it is.

On Thursday night, I had intended to sleep at 10:30 (get ready for a story! :). So I went off MSN at 10. SHOCK HORROR FOR EVERYONE. And sorry Kathy, but I really really did need sleep. Sorzy my meo. So I went into my room.

And then I picked up my guitar. So much for sleeping at 10:30.

I just started playing it for a bit. And then I somehow got into Will You Be There - Skillet. BIGGEST MISTAKE EVERRRRR. Got into singing for God, and I segoed into so many songs it's not funny. None But Jesus, Higher, From The Inside Out, just to name a few. The next time I opened my eyes, it was 11:50. Can't help it can I? Haha.

But yeah funtime. I was scared of waking people up because I was so loud haha. I'm not being proud or anything, but I feel more confident singing in worship than in any other circumstance. But that's just me. Strange, huh?

Anyway I'm feeling better now.

It took me so long to write this, because I started half an hour ago. MSN is so distracting haha. And now I just disconnected from my internet. It's so frustrating having to reconnect it every 3 minutes, and it STILL disconnects. Also, I forget to reconnect it sometimes. Well it's still not connecting, and now I can't even post it.

There it goes.

Okay. This is my time over. I think this blog is significantly shorter than previous ones. Oh well. I'm sorzy that I couldn't quite generate excitement for my blog.

LOL, sarah.

All that Artsy Fartsy stuff.

Ohayo. My name is Sarah. I am cool.

Haha am I kidding myself? :( I've decided to blog today, because I know that I had some ideas earlier. However, now... I've completely forgotten what I wanted to write about. Oh well!

I have an oral tomorrow. An Indonesian one. I have to learn about 20 sentences relating to "sickness". And body parts. In Indonesian. Wooh, wish God's hand on me haha. I'm so gonna get owned, even though I actually studied. HAH, nah I'll be fine. :)

Speaking of Indonesian, I'm really torn between choosing either Music Performance/Music Styles and LOTE: Indonesian next year. I only have space for one more subject, and there is NO WAY I will be changing the ones I've already put down. Here are the facts:

1. I'm currently doing year 10 Music Performance, which is the exact same thing as VCE Music Performance 1&2. Also, I got 98% for my exam, but only 80% for my performance on guitar.

2. I got 80% in Indonesian, but that's hardcore good because it was so hard. Haha. And it's a second language. I heard it gets scaled up by about 10? It's so cool.

3. If I do Music Performance, I will have no friends. Yes, I know it's shallow, but it's true. All my friends wanna do Music Styles if not VCE Music Solo Performance 3&4. I'm the only one that wants to do 1&2 Music Performance. Also, if I were to do Music Performance 1&2, I would have to consider getting a teacher (this year I'm being assessed on guitar). And I'm planning to get a singing teacher, so yeah (I need help getting one, so if anyone can offer me someone that can teach me, email me or call me or chat to me or something.. yeah).

4. I'm good at both subjects. I have experience of music because my older brother used to teach me theory and stuff, and because I used to learn Viet, it's easy for me to grasp Indonesian (word order; spelling; numbers).

5. I love music more. However, I really need to focus a lot more on practice, because I am no where near the level of 3&4 (if so, in need of a guitar teacher).

6. Indonesian may get me to more places?

And yeah, I can't think of any more reasons. But yeah, I'm so torn. It makes me buon. Oh well, no more thinking about it.

I've just realised just how much I write: I write a lot. Like heaps. In every blog, you have to scroll down just so that it would finish haha. It's ridiculous. But I can't help the fact that my mind is filled with useless junk that has the potential to be useful... NOT. HAHA I MADE THE NOT JOKE (couldn't help quoting Borat).

I don't have a daily word today. :(. I'll make it YAHWEH. I'm listening to Exalted (Yahweh) - Chris Tomlin on the album "Hello Love". It's a beautiful song, and it's just so like (an extract of my mind begins about here) JESUS PRAISE YOU, YOU ARE HIGH, MAN I WANNA WORSHIP YOU, THIS SONG IS AWESOME, BUT IT'S YOU THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT AWESOME. And it's true. No worship would really be awesome unless you know who it's directed at. And worship is directed to God, at God, for God. Amen yeah?

Updates: it's got a purple outline, but the actual thing is the same colour of my skin, just flaky! It means it's healing! Yay! // No progress on my picture. I REALLY AM planning on doing a new one... give me time please.

Someone keeps calling me and they're always on private number. GRR! So like they called again today, and I picked up (WIN FOR ME) and I said hello (question-like pitch). Then they hung up. What a waste of credit! And it's so annoying for me because I don't know who's calling and it's scary knowing someone you MIGHT BUT MIGHT NOT know has your number. And they keep refusing to tell me who it is. Not even leaving a name. It's sad.

I really need to get over my feelings. I have control, but my control isn't good enough. Ha. Holy Spirit, it's time to rumble :)

I don't know what to call this blog.. but I suppose you would know already, because by the time you read this I would have already written in the title for today's blog. Oh well.

I'm hungry

LOL, Sarah.

Bedtime stories.

I'm so tired. Dead set tired. Damn man, damn.

Not much to update, my scar is still festy. I have completely stopped colouring my NEW piece of art; why? Because I hate it. Duh. Why would I colour in something I hate? Anyway yessums, I am meant to be doing a few things. I've just remembered that I have an oral presentation on friday, and on the 22nd I have some art thing due. EH. WHATEVER.

Haha.

Everyday I seem to get some pretty random words in my head. A bit like "word of the day" kind of thing. For example, the other day, I kept thinking about perogative. And another was prominent. And now today, derogatory. I don't even know what it means, but it sure does sound cool (:

I have decided to say this: I no longer have any idea what to write.

Ha.

As if anything I've written so far has any relevance to you, apart from maybe you saying occasionally, "Hey! I do that too! Hey, we can totally relate to each other now! We're friends now! YAY!" Well yeah, I suppose, you're lame. Haha nah I'm joking, it's totally cool to relate to people.

I suppose I do go deep, but it's never really revealed, because I have speech problems. Ha. Someone told me a few days ago that when we think, our mind is talking to ourselves. And I was like. Huh. So true... lol. Yes, I say Lol. Now shoosh. :) I'll just reveal a little something of how my mind works.

In any situation, any strange circumstance, my mind is somehow able to wind it into a story. For example, I'm in a fight, and I'm standing next to the girl who's angry at me. And we just stood there, still, unable to break the deafening silence between us. I could not bring myself to speak, for there was nothing more I could say. It was her that would change everything, if only she would forgive me.

Haha, there you go. An exerpt of my mind. A sad attempt also, at trying to sound like a professional writer. Makes me laugh. It's interesting though, I love how my mind works. Makes me think, life could be like a story. Well for your information Sarah, yes, it is! Life is a story, perhaps one of the most dramatic stories ever set in a first person's point of view: you. Which then reminds me: should you really be looking through your point of view? Where you have ultimate control of what you see, hear, think, or do? Everything is as dramatic as you want it... it's a story. It's your story. But is it your story? Are you really the writer? Or are you the character that experiences the events that you do? Is not the author God?

Point to ponder ;)

Where you gonna go? Salvation is here.

Funny, I write how I talk. For example, in my previous blog... "Is it to glorify God? Or something else." Yeah, it's bad grammar, I know. But I was so into it when I was writing; my mind went something like this: Is it to GLORIFY GOD? (voice going to a higher pitch) OR SOMEthing else? (voice returning to original pitch).

Get me? Well it doesn't really matter.

Arrivederci! (Please don't kill me, I haven't done Italian for over 5 years now) Hehe. It means see you later, and that's all I remember.

Oh yes, I shall also tell you the meaning of my NAME! As in my username. Ok basically it means this.

Lots Of Love, Sarah.

OH SNAP! :)

Raging Worship.

Ohmylol, more people have started blogging. How exciting! Yay!

Yes. Anyway. I suppose my only motivation to blog is because of Aiball, of which he makes it more of an obligation, since every single flipping day he asks me to update the damn thing. No, not that there's anything wrong with blogging, it's just I RUN OUT OF IDEAS SOMETIMES YOU KNOW, AND LIKE, I CAN'T ALWAYS BE TALKING ABOUT HOW MY DAY WAS, IT GETS PRETTY BORING YOU KNOW, AND LIKE, YEAH.

I'm really not in the best happy mood, so YAY! You get to see me rage like crazy! How fun. Not really. Sorry Aiball, I didn't mean to take it out on you, but you told me to vent, and so I did (: So be proud of me, I'm actually venting.

Until someone can prove me wrong, I believe that all BOYS are the same. Tools, jerks, and annoying. Note that I used BOYS. BOYS are immature. If you want more deets, chat to me, haha. I'm not gonna go into detail because it's way too public and it's too personal for the public eye. So har har, if you don't have my email, chances are you don't even know me! -_-.

Who reads random people's blogs anway? I really should be more supportive and start reading other people's blogs though. I feel so loved when I get comments... I should return the love. Ha. Sorry guys, I really do love you... I think.

So yeah, I shall update you on my scar.

It's pretty yuck and festy. I peeled off the burnt part, that was going to fall off anyway. It's all flakey and stuff now. Pretty nasty.

What else shall I talk about? Oh yes. It's something I learnt on Friday. About worship. I'll get right into it because I suck at creating a segoe (is that how you spell it?) into my point.

As a worship leader, part of a worship band, our purpose is not to set the mood for people to feel comfortable in glorifying God. Sure, it's all cool for that, it can be really nice and sounding really awesome, but that's most definitely not our purpose, and is absolutely not a way in which we can lead people to God. Why? Because what is the feedback you get? Is it "Oh, your band sounded awesome, your singing and harmonies were perfect and the guitars were in top shape; I can't forget about the drums, the syncopated beats are just ahh, so perfect. It's a very good mood for worship". Or is it something like this? "I could see who you were worshipping, and it was awesome, even though you guys didn't sound the best, it was easy to tell how great your God is."

There's a big difference in setting the mood, and letting people sense God's presence. Our job is not to put on a performance, but to allow people to recognise our God. And our purpose is to glorify God. Not just in a band either. In everyday life?

I used to ask, "how do you glorify God in everything you do? How can you glorify God when you're writing an essay? Put scriptures in it or something? I don't get it..."

Haha, yes, you can put scripture, but ultimately, it shouldn't be HOW you glorify God in everything you do, but WHY you do everything. What is the purpose of your actions? Is it to glorify God? Or something else.

Man that was so random.

I'll leave youse to it then :)

Catch ya later! (I hope no one catches you now :)

Rainbows and Butterflies.

Hay look, it's a 2 year old drawing (enlarge by clicking on the photo... please). Heo yeah. In case you can't recognise it (or even as much read the heading), it's a picture of all the characters from the Little Miss and Mr. Men series. I used to have all these books of them, but no longer do I have them... I think we've given them away, after ridiculously colouring and drawing all over them with pencils (back in the days....heo yeah). Anyway this picture took me 6 weeks approx. A few hourse each week. It. Took. Ages. And I'm not completely satisfied at this, because I rushed to finish it, and I left gaping holes between a lot of where I coloured. But you can't blame me, I was only 13. HA HA . 13 is young okay.

Which brings me to this: it's amazing how quickly talent is lost. This picture is a perfect example. My talent in colouring has evidently deteriorated over the past few years, as well as drawing. I used to draw heaps. I lost the passion.

This is a really boring blog! Anyway so today I woke up, and did homework, which consisted of reading, writing, and colouring in. I suppose this blog is mainly about colouring in, since I've talked excessively about colouring in already (see above for details). Then I went on msn, and continued to colour. Then I began to learn Plug In Baby (acoustic) by Muse. It's a cool song. Then I completely stopped colouring and began to talk to people. Which I am also doing now. I also ate by the way. I ate KFC. I wanted Subway, but my older brother guilt tripped me into eating KFC. How does that work? I don't know, but I'm feeling light headed now. Anyway, I'll explain.

I was awake for hours, drifting in and out of sleep (I see now that maybe I wasn't completely awake for hours after all). And my older brother somehow towered over me, and I only realised once my bed started tilting on my left. By the way, I sleep upside-down. I'll leave you to figure out what that means!

And so he asked me what I wanted, and I said Subway. Gawrsh, I haven't had it for so long. Anyway, we got in the car, two brothers and me, and my older brother said to my other brother that he should eat KFC so that my older brother would only need to buy a Family Feast. Then he told me that we can still get Subway, and then get KFC, but if I wanted KFC, we just needed to go to St. Albans. Subway was in Sunshine. I felt bad, so we got KFC.

Dodgy. I feel really lightheaded. Sorry for the lame as blog!

"For from the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks." Matthew 12:34

It became clear to me just how fatal my words can be when my heart is filled with things like frustration, anger, pain and sadness. And how much my words can hurt. Which it has. I could not help it, because my words were simply the overflow of my heart. But that doesn't justify the hurt I cause.

Just something I learnt through the week.

I've started Devotions again. Yay!

Still light headed.

Skadoosh!